


Memory of the Void

by o_WinterQueen_o



Category: Bleach
Genre: Character Study, Ficlet, Freeform, Gen, Inner world, Post-Time Skip, Shirosaki contemplates emotions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-29
Updated: 2017-08-29
Packaged: 2018-12-21 10:38:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11942379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/o_WinterQueen_o/pseuds/o_WinterQueen_o
Summary: Bitter and Lonely, these are two of the few emotions he can understand.





	Memory of the Void

**Author's Note:**

> My ramblings on Shiro's feeling in regards to the use of Mugetsu tbh, hope y'all enjoy.

Blue. Silence. Darkness. Emptiness.

Shirosaki hated the sight of empty blue skies. Vast and wide and oh so endless, he abhorred them vehemently. With all the time he spent trapped inside the inner world, he came to hold a special hatred for that shade of blue that blankets his world. Still, the great blue emptiness was nothing compared to the vast nothingness that the soul world had become in those seventeen unbearable months. 

Those months of powerlessness he spent “ _living_ ” in a vacuum were nearly enough to make him lose what little sanity he had left. It _hurt_ to think about such things... How Ichigo, his king, his host, his wielder, his **soul** had so willingly given him up. They didn’t **_need_ ** Mugetsu to win! Goddamn that fucking Quincy and the boy’s idiot father for telling him about it! Engetsu was a fool for letting that knowledge be known! Had he shown Ichigo his true power, _their true power,_ they could have **killed** Aizen— but no... The Quincy wouldn’t allow it. He would rather let them be torn apart– right out of Ichigo’s soul– just so the boy would remain “innocent” a while longer... And Ichigo did it... He ripped his own soul apart for _them_.

Shirosaki had no need for a heart, but the unbeating vestigial organ in his chest still ached just a bit knowing that no matter what he did, Ichigo would always throw them on the fire rather than risk putting those weaklings in danger. How idiotic that kind of attachment was. Pathetic. Pointless. **Weak** . It angered him. It disgusted him him. It filled him with…longing…and loneliness...? How utterly  _pitiful_.

That feeling…. Knowing that no matter what he did, everything about him could be erased in an instant... That he could be trapped in some point between life and death for decades because of someone else’s will... _because of his_ **_master’s_ ** _will_... The hollow despised it with all of his being.

No matter _what_ Shirosaki did that selfishly selfless goddamned **bastard** would never value _him_ over **them** . The _one and only_ person he would always be bound to throughout all eternity— the one person he could ever muster up a single _shred_ of **caring** for— just so happened to hate himself so much he could never care about his sword. Because he was his sword and his sword was him and because of that, in the King’s eyes, neither of them really mattered...

The memory of the void made him feel so many things, but in the end, the was nothing more prominent than the loneliness. When push came to shove, not even his literal other half cared enough to let him live.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, please review.


End file.
